1. “There’s nothing like sitting back and talking to your cows.” – Russell Crowe
2. “Even a cow creates ambiguous signifiers. The moo of mystery.” – Mason Cooley
3. “To my mind, the only possible pet is a cow. Cows love you. They will be your friends forever.” – Bill Bryson
4. “I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought, I’d rather dance with the cows until you come home.” – Groucho Marx
5. “Cows are gentle, interesting animals.” – Ingrid Newkirk
6. “It doesn’t matter how much milk you spill as long as you don’t lose the cow.” – Harvey Mackay
7. “My cow is not pretty, but it is pretty to me.” – David Lynch
8. “Cows are amongst the gentlest of breathing creatures.” – Thomas de Quincey
9. “Cows are my passion—to retreat to a Swiss farm, and live entirely surrounded by cows, and china.” – Charles Dickens
10. “I have found you and fallen into such a blunder. I suppose he has confounded the cow with the deer.” – James Boswell
11. “Buffon tells us that the cow sheds her horns every two years; a most palpable error.” – James Boswell
12. “Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. In fact, a moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old.” – Bill Bryson
13. “Sacred cows make the best hamburger.” – Mark Twain
14. “A branding program should be designed to differentiate your cow from all the other cattle on the range.” – Al Ries
15. “He was so learned that he could name a horse in nine languages; so ignorant that he bought a cow to ride on.” – Benjamin Franklin
16. “You can only milk a cow so long, then you’re left holding the pail.” –
17. “The human body has no more need for cows’ milk than it does for dogs’ milk, horses’ milk, or giraffes’ milk.” – Michael Klaper
18. “The cow is of the bovine ilk—one end is moo, the other, milk.” –
19. “As for butter versus margarine, I trust cows more than chemists.” – Joan Dye Gussow
20. “Moo may represent an idea, but only the cow knows.” – Mason Cooley
21. “Cease, cows, life is short.” – Gabriela Garcia Marquez
22. “Anybody who plays the stock market not as an insider is like a man buying cows in the moonlight.” – Daniel Drew
23. “The cow parasite is probably how non-man defines man in his zoology books.” – Stanislaw Lem
24. “I have a history of saving animals. I started years ago with a cow.” – Peter Max
25. “Cow-slaughter and man-slaughter are, in my opinion, two sides of the same coin.” – Mahatma Gandhi
26. “Not every man remembers the name of the cow which supplied him with each drop of milk he has drunk.” – Shmuel Yosef Agnon
27. “Since the cruel killing of cows and other animals have commenced, I have anxiety for the future generation.” – Lala Lajpat Rai
28. “We say the cows laid out Boston. Well, there are worse surveyors.” –
29. “I got mouths to feed, unnecessary beef is more cows to breed.” – GZA
30. “Cows are a lot smarter across the board than bulls.” – Thomas Haden Church
31. “The cow is the purest type of sub-human life.” – Mahatma Gandhi
32. “Farm animals feel pleasure, sadness, excitement. They are far more intelligent than we ever imagined.” –
33. “Cows are the Devil’s handmaidens.” – Linda Howard
34. “Cow protection means protection of the weak, the helpless, the deaf.” – Mahatma Gandhi
35. “Who discovered we could get milk from cows and what did he think he was doing at the time?” – Billy Connolly
36. “Truth, Sir, is a cow that will yield such people no more milk, and so they are gone to milk the bull.” – Samuel Johnson
37. “Keep a cow, and then the milk won’t have to be watered but once.” – John Billings
38. “Thanks cows. I appreciate your tastiness.” – Craig Ferguson
39. “North Dakota State. What do you have to do there to graduate? Milk a cow with your left hand?” – Bobby Heenan
40. “A dead cow or lying in a pasture is recognized as carrion. The same sort of a carcass dressed and hung up in a butcher’s stall passes as food.” – John Harvey Kellogg
41. “It was jolly in the country. A cow and to play with and milk warm from the cow.” – Georg Brandes
42. “The cow can be saved only if buffalo-breeding is given up.” – Mahatma Gandhi
43. “Scoops of mint ice cream with chips of chocolate cows.” – Jim Bishop
44. “The friendly cow, all red and white, I love with all my heart; she gives me cream to eat with apple-tart.” – Robert Louis Stevenson
45. “Custard—a detestable substance produced by conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook.” – Ambrose Bierce
46. “Pigs, and cows, and chickens, and people are all competing for grain.” – Margaret Mead
47. “Mankind has a free will; but it is free to milk cows and to build houses, nothing more.” – Martin Luther
48. “Milk is the only juice in a world of cows.” – Munia Khan
49. “Who will sell the cow, must say the word.” – George Herbert
50. “No longer diverted by other emotions, I work the way a cow grazes.” – Kathe Kollwitz
51. “Home is where my cows are.” – Anonymous
52. “I don’t believe that you have to be a cow to know what milk is.” – Ann Landers
53. “The cow is nothing but a machine which makes grass fit for us people to eat.” – John McNulty
54. “Sacred cows make very poor gladiators.” – Nikki Giovanni
55. “The mere brute pleasure of reading—the sort of pleasure a cow must have in grazing.” – Lord Chesterfield
56. “A publisher who writes is like a cow in a milk bar.” – Arthur Koestler
57. “To give your sheep or cow a large, spacious meadow is the way to control him.” – Shunryu Suzuki
58. “It is my custom to keep on talking until I get the audience cowed.” – Mark Twain
59. “Every species has some distinguishing mark that can tell a man from a beast, or a dog from a cow.” – Mahatma Gandhi
60. “It’s not socially acceptable to be a complete and utter manipulative cow.” – Lena Headey
61. “As a calf follows its mother among a thousand cows, so deeds of a man follow him.” – Chanakya
62. “Cows are one thing. But one man telling another man where he can go in this country is something else.” – Robert Duval
63. “The cow is an exceptionally loving and gentle creature.” – Helen Watson
64. “Mother cow is as useful dead as when she is alive.” – Mahatma Gandhi
65. “Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.” – Will Rogers
66. “All the really good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow.” – Grant Wood
67. “I never saw a purple cow; I never hope to see one. I’d rather see than be one.” – Gelett Burgess
68. “I don’t want any vegetables. I paid for the cow to eat them for me.” – Douglas Coupland
69. “I’m a cowboy who never saw a cow.” – Johnny Mercer
70. “If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?” –
71. “I guess cows aren’t into the four food groups, especially when they are two of them.” – Anthony Ward Clark
72. “If I have to, I’ll go and direct theater and talk till the cows come home.” – Ridley Scott
73. “I’ve never met a general yet who could milk a cow.” – Lennart Meri
74. “Don’t have a cow, man.” – Matt Groening
75. “Don’t milk the cow too hard. She will kick you.” – Mason Cooley
76. “The sweet mellifluous milking of the cow.” – Sam Walter Foss
77. “When you see the cows go into McDonalds, you know that their beef burgers are fresh.” – Anthony T. Hicks
78. “Once you kill a cow, you gotta make a burger.” –
79. “Cow-watching turned out to be a mildly pleasant duty.” – Christian M. Scott
80. “I do believe sometimes discipline is very important. I’m not just lying around like a lazy cow all the time.” – Bjork
81. “If I don’t work, I’ll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn, and getting like a cow.” – Celia Cruz
82. “I can drink tea until the cows come home and I love the atmosphere in tea-shops.” – Zola Budd
83. “I like animals—all animals. I wouldn’t hurt , or a dog, or a chicken, or a cow. And I wouldn’t ask someone else to hurt them for me. That’s why I’m a vegetarian. “– Peter Dinklage
84. “I cannot harness a horse. I am afraid of a cow.” – Lyman Abbott
85. “She always says that facts are like cows. If you look them in the face hard enough, they generally run away.” – Dorothy L. Sayers
86. “I’m not the one to sort of sit and cry over spilt milk. I’m too busy looking for the next cow.” –
87. “Playing golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture.” – Winston Churchill
88. “Learning is like a cow of desire. It, like her, yields in all seasons.” – Chanakya
89. “It’s true—every time you kill an elk, you’re saving some cow’s life.” – Edward Abbey
90. “How do we get a pantomime cow on set. Jeez, the rigours of satire.” – Mel Smith
91. “Whoever said, ‘Everything happens for a reason,’ has never had a cow step on her foot.” – Whippoorwill Valley
92. “Life has got a habit of not standing hitched. You got to ride it like you find it. You got to change with it. If a day goes by that doesn’t change some of your old notions for new ones, that is just about like trying to milk a dead cow.” – Woody Gurthie
93. “I was thinking about the cow thing, or something like that.” – Dandi Daley Mackall
94. “I don’t know how many sacred cows there are today. I think there’s a little confusion between humor and gross passing for humor. That’s kind of regrettable.” – Bob Newhart
95. “Just because a cow stands in a field all day doesn’t make it a philosopher.” – Vaseem Khan
96. “If you do not milk the cow fully, it falls sick.” – Lalu Prasad Yadav
97. “The average man is a conformist, accepting miseries with the stoicism of a cow standing in the rain.” – Colin Wilson
98. “A mind of the caliber of mine cannot derive its nutrients from cows.” – George Bernarnd Shaw
99. “Seen from a perspective of diversity, we have lost out a cow that serves as a source of sustainable energy.” – Vandana Shiva
100. “It’s no good crying over spilt milk; all we can do is bail up another cow.” – Ben Shifley
101. “A curst cow hath short hornes.” – George Herbert
102. “Every cow in the world, when they do what they do, you’ve got more carbon dioxide.” – John Boehner
103. “Every sacred cow in the business has to do with economics.” – Gena Rowlands
104. “The money in politics is a cash cow for the media.” – Noam Chomsky
105. “I’m a regular dude from Kansas who grew up with pigs and cows.” – Eric Stonestreet
106. “I absolutely adore cows. They’re the most fascinating, gentle, and beautiful animals. Their eyes are so amazing.” – Mary Quant
107. “This country is so urbanized, we think low-fat milk comes from cows on Nutri/System weight-loss plans.” – P. J. O’Rourke
108. “Rain or shine, dairy farmers care for their cows 365 days of the year!” – Anonymous
109. “Without my cattle, my wallet would be full, my house would be clean, but my heart would be empty.” – Anonymous
110. “To country people, cows are mild, all the cattle seem to know.” – T.S. Eliot
111. “On the farm, I had chores. I had a calf. We had a herd of cattle in the pasture. We’d go and get me a calf at a cow auction with Amish people, which I would raise. I gave it a bottle every day, in this little coop, like a giant dog coop almost. I’ve always been a big animal person.” – Krysten Ritter
112. “Scrimshaw on cow horns is only common in Australia, and in the Wild West.” – Tom Thompson
113. “If happiness truly consisted in physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow.” – William Lyon Phelps
114. “If a cow walked into this room, I’d probably walk out. I could milk it, but my dad never forced me to do a lot of chores like that, mostly because he loved doing it himself.” – Stuart Appleby
115. “Cows make me happy. You, not so much.” – Anonymous
116. “Never a person who doesn’t like cows.” – Anonymous
117. “I will love you till the cows come home.” – Anonymous
118. “When I’m driving and see cows, I will make an announcement to the rest of the car, that there are cows.” – Anonymous
119. “Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy cows. And that’s pretty much the same thing.” – Anonymous
120. “I do not believe there was a life more attractive than life on a cattle ranch.” – Anonymous
121. “Something in the way she moos attracts me like no udder lover.” – Anonymous
122. “I workout—just kidding, I chase cows.” – Anonymous
123. “Live life like someone left the gate open.” – Anonymous
124. “Forney, if you give a cow chocolate will you get chocolate milk?” – Americus Nation
125. “Irreverence is our only sacred cow.” – Paul Krassner
126. “The cow knows not what her tail is worth till she has lost it.” – George Herbert
127. “Fortune is beastly—it is only suitable for cows and businessmen.” – Irving Stone
128. “Kill me, but spare the cow.” – Lokmanya Tilak
129. “A cow is a very good animal in the field; but we turn her out of a garden.” – Samuel Johnson
130. “If one has one cow, it is always better not to be too familiar with those who have seven.” – Phyllis Bottome
131. “A cow’s heaven is a flower’s idea of hell.” – Oliver Gaspirtz
132. “Man is as much a parasite on the cow as the tapeworm is on man—we have sucked their udders like leeches.” – Stanislaw Lem
133. “I have been heartbroken once and it has affected all my relationships from there on. But now I look at it as an occupational hazard. If you are in the meat market at some point you are gonna get mad cow disease.” – Dominic Monaghan
134. “I’ve always thought the word cow was funny. And cows are sort of tragic figures. Cows blur the line between tragedy and humor.” – Gary Larson
135. “The United States is not just an old cow that gives more milk the more it’s kicked in the flanks.” – Dean Rusk
136. “We are like a cow and a goat, wanting to be friends but wondering if it can ever be.” – Katherine Applegate
137. “If cows and horses had hands and could draw, cows would draw gods that look like cows and horses would draw gods that look like horses.” – Xenophanes
138. “When the land is cultivated entirely by the spade, and no horses are kept, a cow is kept for every three acres of land.” –
139. “Mother cow is in many ways better than the mother who gave us birth.” – Mahatma Gandhi
140. “If you want milk, don’t sit on a stool in the hope that a cow will back up to you.” – Richard Branson
141. “Men are not so much the keepers of herds as herds are the keepers of men.” – Henry David Thoreau
142. “Knowledge is a sacred cow, and my problem will be how we can milk her while keeping clear of her horns.” – Albert Szent-Gyorgyi
143. “It is not an act of kindness to treat animals respectfully. It is an act of justice.” – Tom Reagan
144. “One can quite understand vegetarianism. One can quite understand meat-eating. But it is difficult to understand why a person who is a flesh-eater should object to one kind of flesh, namely cow’s flesh. This is an anomaly which calls for explanation.” – B.R. Ambedkar
145. “The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the devil’s own satanic herd!” – Rowan Atkinson
146. “Both knife and sword will cause the same pain, both cow and dog will feed the same milk.” – Dr.P.S. Jagadeesh Kumar
147. “This was more than just a cow—this was an entire career I was looking at.” – Gary Larson
148. “I write in order to attain that feeling of tension relieved and function achieved which a cow enjoys on giving milk.” – H.K. Mencken
149. “Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it’s doing in the Maritimes.” – Tommy Douglas
150. “The cow’s point of view deserves more literary attention.” – Mason Cooley
151. “Not only do I know how to milk a cow, but I know how to herd a bunch of cows, too, which is a life skill that I think may come in handy someday.” – Martina McBride
152. “We need to respect the fact that cows are herbivores, and that does not mean feeding them corn and chicken manure.” – Joel Salatin
153. “Who was the first guy that looked at a cow and said, ‘I think that I’ll drink whatever comes out of those things when I squeeze them?’” – Bill Watterson
154. “You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of beans.” – Tom Robbins
155. “As writers, we live life twice, like a cow that eats its food once and then regurgitates it to chew and digest it again. We have a second chance at biting into our experience and examining it. This is our life and it’s not going to last forever.” – Natalie Goldberg
156. “Cows run away from the storm while the buffalo charges toward it, and gets through it quicker. Whenever I’m confronted with a tough challenge, I do not prolong the torment, I become the buffalo.” – Wilma Mankiller
157. “If you are not interested in your own country’s problems, then what difference remains between you and a cow eating grass in a quiet corner unaware of anything around itself!” – Mehmet Murat ildan
158. “The best way to control cows and sheep is to give them a big grazing field.” – Shunryu Suzuki
159. “If the grass seems greener on the other side, chances are it was fertilized with bullshit.” – Unknown
160. “The cow is sacred, and as a result, most Indians do not eat beef.” – Maneet Chauhan
161. “Cow protection is the gift of Hinduism to the world.” – Mahatma Gandhi
162. “A household can never appear prosperous without a cow. How auspicious it is to wake up in the morning to the mooing of your own cow!” – Munshi Premchand
163. “Cow’s milk is tonic, its ghee is ambrosia, and its meat is disease.” – Anonymous
164. “Cow is the source of progress and prosperity.” – Mahatma Gandhi
165. “All is not butter that comes from the cow.” – Proverb
166. “Milk the cow, but do not pull off the udder.” – Greek proverb
167. “Go to law for a sheep and lose your cow.” – German Proverb
168. “Science is not a sacred cow. Science is a horse. Don’t worship it. Feed it.” – Aubrey Eben
169. “You don’t miss the cow until the stall is empty.” – Swedish Proverb
170. “Massages are very cheap in Nairobi, so the cow would be comfortable.” – Binyavanga Wainaina
171. “None show more passionate tenderness to their young. I am not ashamed to profess a deep love for these quiet creatures.” – Thomas de Quincey
172. “I can tell a good cowboy by the way he approaches a cow.” – Henry Green
173. “You’re a cow, give me some milk or else go home.” – Bob Dylan
174. “Agriculture is one of the biggest causes of greenhouse gases in the atmosphere. Cars? Planes? Trains? Nope. Cow farts.” – Zazie Beetz
175. “Ever consider what pets must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul—chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!” – Anne Tyler
176. “I don’t do impersonations. I can do a wounded ! I can do a really good cow! And because of the amount of time I spent in North Yorkshire, I do a variety of sheep. All of which I will be happy to roll out for you!” – Patrick Stewart
177. “Skinny Cow ice cream and candy—like dancing—brings a little bit of fun to your day.” – Jennifer Grey
178. “For the very best, drink milk from the goat, ricotta from the sheep, and cheese from the cow”. – Sicilian Proverb
179. “Cows forget that they were calves.” – Russian Proverb
180. “Holy cow!” – Harry Caray
181. “Kiss till the cow comes home.” – Francis Beaumont
182. “Holy cow, she was tough as nails, man.” – Paul Orndorff
183. “That sure as fuck ain’t no cow.” – Scott Sigler
184. “The cow to me is a sermon on pity.” – Mahatma Gandhi
185. “Digression and digestion. It’s what we do.” – David Duchovny
186. “Cows scream louder than carrots.” –
187. “Have patience. The grass will be milk soon enough.” – Anonymous
188. “I’d rather kiss a mad cow on the muzzle than a smoker on the mouth.” – Paul Carvel
189. “Total contentment is only for cows.” – Bette Midler
190. “A good cow may have an ill calf.” – Scottish Proverb
191. “A cow that has no tail should not try to chase away flies.” – Guinean proverb
192. “The cow knows the cowherd but not the owner.” – Ethiopian Proverb
193. “Religion is a cow. It gives milk, but it also kicks.” – Gautama Buddha
194. “You master, I master, who milking the cow.” – Turkish Proverb
195. “Building the fence, when the cows are all stolen.” – Thai Proverb
196. “Settling a dispute through the law is like losing a cow for the sake of a cat.” – Chinese Proverb
197. “I own a cow in heaven, but I cannot drink her milk.” – Congolese Proverb
198. “Who wants yogurt in winter must carry a cow in his pocket.” – Turkish Proverb
199. “God does not give horns to a cow that likes to gore.” – Russian Proverb
200. “The old cow forgets that she was once a calf.” – Finnish Proverb
201. “When the mother cow is cropping grass, her young one watches her mouth.” – Nigerian Proverb
202. “A fool looks for dung where the cow never grazed.” – Ethiopian Proverb
203. “Better a goat that can give milk than a cow that cannot.” – Estonian Proverb
204. “A cow is not oppressed by its own hump.” – Swahili Proverb
205. “All cows are black in the dark.” – Hungarian Proverb
206. “Everyone is nice till the cow gets into the garden.” – Irish Proverb
207. “It is difficult to teach a cow to climb a tree.” – Lithuanian Proverb
208. “Milk belongs to the cow, but the bull cow gets the publicity.” – Malaya Proverb
209. “For a cow and a calf, you need a man and a stable boy.” – Sicilian Proverb
210. “Those cows trusted us.” – Mitch Robberts
211. “I’m going down to Cowtown. The cow’s a friend to me.” – They Might Be Giants
212. “Your cow is calling you.” – Dallas
213. “Honey, puppies are cute. These are just cheeseburgers with legs.” – Frank from Two If By Sea
214. “She dragged me across the floor, stopping from time to time only to kick me. I didn’t know our cows, too, could be so inhuman.” – Samuel Beckett
215. “It’s a moo point. It’s like a cow’s opinion; it doesn’t matter. It’s moo.” – Joey Tribbiani
216. “It’s time to boldly go where no cow has gone before.” – Little Bo Peep
217. “The cow hasn’t been born yet that can give birth to the bull that can hurt me!” – Mitch Robbins
218. “We were something slow happening inside the cold brain of a cow.” – Robert Penn 219. Warren
219. “I loved working with Renoir on ‘The Southerner.’ Oh, I loved it! I particularly loved it when he had a scene with a cow going through a garden, and he wanted a little dog to come and bark at it and chase it out.” – Norman Lloyd
220. “Nothing is worse than being alone on the evening of the day when one’s cow has exploded.” – Dean Koontz
221. “Three acres and a cow.” – Jeremy Bentham
222. “Yeah. And if you spin a cow around real fast you’ll get whipped cream.” – Forney Hull
223. “There is something wrong with your cow. I reach under there and I’m pulling, tugging, tugging, pulling, nothing, not a drop.” – Glen Robbins
224. “Hey, I hope you don’t mind. I got up a little early, so I took the liberty of milking your cow for you. Yeah, it took a little while to get her warmed up, she sure is a stubborn one. Then, pow, all at once.” – Roy
225. “The history of agriculture is the history of humans breeding seeds and animals to produce traits we want in our crops and livestock.” – Michael Specter
226. “Butchering your own livestock is not glamorous, especially when some were your four-legged farm friends!” – Brenda Knight
227. “Studying cows, pigs, and chickens can help an actor develop his character.” – James Dean
228. “It had been a long winter full of cows.” – Jane Smiley
229. “A cow out on grass is just an incredible thing to behold. Cows and other ruminants can do things we just can’t do.” – Michael Pollan