2. “Would you like a little more tea?”

3. “Of course not. This is an unbirthday party!”

4. “If you knew Time as well as I do, you wouldn’t talk about wasting it. It’s him.”

5. “You mean you can’t take less. It’s very easy to take more than nothing.”

6. “Egad, you learn something new every day.”

7. “Yes, yes, but you would have to be half-mad to dream me up.”

8. “There is a place, like no place on earth. A land full of wonder, mystery, and danger. Some say, to survive it, you need to be as mad as a hatter. Which, luckily, I am.”

9. “People who don’t think shouldn’t talk.”

10. “What a regrettably large head you have. I would very much like to hat it. I used to hat The White Queen, you know. Her head was so small.”

11. “I shall elucidate.”

12. “Why should it? Does your watch tell you what year it is?”

13. “Okay, he’s as mad as a box of frogs.”

14. “A dream is not reality, but who’s to say which is which?”

15. “Why is it you’re always too small or too tall?”

16. “Oh, tea! I never ‘thought’ of tea! Of course!”

17. “We never get compliments, you must have a cup of tea!”

18. “What’s the matter, my dear, don’t you care for tea?”

19. Mad Hatter: “Teeeea?”

March Hare: “Just half a cup, if you don’t mind.”

20. “Yes, that’s it. It’s always tea time, and we’ve no time to wash the things between whiles.”

Mad Hatter Quotes to Give You Insight Into Their World and Into the Characters

21. “What is the hatter with me?”

22. “Mustard! Yes, mu—mustard? Don’t. Let’s be silly! Lemon, that’s different.”

23. Mad Hatter: “Your carriage, my lady.”

Alice: “A hat?”

24. “Yes, but some crumbs must have got it as well. You shouldn’t have put it in with the bread-knife.”

25. “He took his vorpal sword in hand, the vorpal blade went snicker-snack. He left it dead, and with its head, he went galumphing back. It’s all about you, you know.”

26. “The last time a girl called Alice came here from your world, she brought down the whole House of Cards. Oh yeah. Made quite an impression. Although, it was 150 years ago. It can’t be the same girl. Oysters don’t even live that long.”

27. Mad Hatter: “Why is a raven like a writing desk? Have you guessed the riddle yet?”

Alice: “No, I give it up. What’s the answer?”

Mad Hatter: “I haven’t the slightest idea.”

28. Alice: “Sometimes, I believe in as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”

Mad Hatter: “That is an excellent practice.”

29. “Now, if you only kept on good terms with him, he’d do almost anything you liked with the clock.”

30. “Make a note of that, Marchy, it might come in useful.”

31. “Down with the bloody Red Queen!”

32. “No wonder you’re late. Why this watch is exactly two days slow?”

33. Mad Hatter: “What day of the month is it?”

Alice: “The fourth.”

34. “You can draw water out of a water-well, so I should think you could draw treacle out of a treacle-well—eh, stupid?”

35. Alice: “Who are you?”

Mad Hatter: “A friend. I hope.”

36. “Personal remarks are rude?”

37. Mad Hatter: “Have I gone mad?”

Alice: “I’m afraid so. You’re entirely bonkers. But I’ll tell you a secret. All the best people are.”

38. “I keep them to sell. I’ve none of my own. I’m a hatter.”

39. “Your hair wants cutting.”

40. “You might just as well say that ‘I see what I eat,’ is the same thing as ‘I eat what I see!’”

41. “One to be a murderer, the other to be martyred, one to be a monarch, the other to go mad.”

42. “Yes, yes. And when you come to the end—stop. See?”

43. “You used to be much more ’muchier.’ You’ve lost your muchness.”

44. Alice: “This is impossible.” 

Mad Hatter: “Only if you believe it is.”

45. “No. Because I’m always there when they pass the hat, so to speak.”

46. “For instance, suppose it were nine o’clock in the morning, just time to begin lessons: you’d only have to whisper a hint to Time, and round goes the clock in a twinkling! Half-past one, time for dinner!”

47. “I dare say you never even spoke to Time!”

48. “I want a clean cup, let’s all move one place on.”

49. “Pieces of paper! Pointless.”

50. Alice: “Really, now you ask me, I don’t think—.”

Mad Hatter: “Then, you shouldn’t talk.”

51. “Two days wrong! I told you butter wouldn’t suit the works!”

52. “Of course. Anyone can go by horse or rail, but the absolute best way to travel is by hat. Have I made a rhyme?”

53. “My response to that is both profound and meaningful: get your hair cut!”

54. “I’ve been considering words that start with the letter M. Moron. Mutiny. Murder. Mmm—malice.”

55. King Oleron: “Take off your hat!”

Mad Hatter: “It isn’t mine.”

56. “I know a thing or two about liking people, and in time, after much chocolate and cream cake, ‘like’ turns into ‘what was his name again?'”

57. “When that day comes I shall futterwacken—vigorously.”

58. “Speaking of the Queen, here’s a little song we used to sing in her honor.”

59. “I can’t go no lower, I’m on the floor, as it is.”

60. Mad Hatter: “I’d like to keep it on.”

Executioner: “Suit yourself. As long as I can get at your neck.”

61. “Ah! That accounts for it. He won’t stand beating.”

62. Alice: “Of course not, but that’s because it stays the same year for such a long time together.”

Mad Hatter: “Which is just the case with mine.”

63. “Already lost them. All together now!”

64. Alice: “I was sitting on the riverbank with uh—with you know who—.”

Mad Hatter: “I do?”

Alice: “I mean my cat.”

65. Mad Hatter: “Do you know why they call me Hatter?”

Alice: “Because you wear a hat?”

66. “Wow! Really? Woooo! Ratty here thinks you’re Alice of Legend.”

67. “Twinkle twinkle little bat, how I wonder where you’re at. Up above the world, you fly, like a tea-tray in the sky.”

68. “Twas brillig, and the slithy toves. Did gyre and gimble in the wabe? All mimsy were the borogoves, and the mome raths outgrabe.”

69. “Well. The entire world is falling to ruins and poor Cheshire’s off his tea.”

70. Mad Hatter: “You could stay.”


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